Most weeks I go down to my section two to three times in the evenings to spend times with my girls! Usually the evenings are filled with card games, listening to music, looking at magazines, helping with homework, chores, gossiping and the occasional soccer game. I stay down in the section until the tía turns out the lights--which means everyone in bed now! The girls all grab their ponchos (blankets) and hop into bed. I usually pass by each of them in their beds and say goodnight and give them a hug or kiss.
The past two times I have been down in my section one of my girls has asked me to lay with her for a few minutes. After I laid down she told me that she did not want to go to sleep. I was thinking why the hell not you get up soooooo early--you have got to be tired. When I asked her why she didn't want to go to sleep she told me it was because she has the same dream every night and she wakes up screaming. She continued to tell me in the dream someone comes to NPH and tells her that all of her family has been killed. What an awful dream. As we laid next to each other I suggested that we think of other things that she can dream about. We made a list of different things that make her happy and that would be nice dreams to have. I gave her a hug and wished her sweet dreams. As I went to get up she grabbed me hand and said that she was going to try and dream about me and the two of us spending time together. I bent down and kissed her on the head.
I love all of these girls so much and if I could take away all their hurt I would. I wish I could protect them all and make sure they all had sweet dreams--but all I can do is be there for now and show them I love and care about them. I have to believe that that is enough even though sometimes it doesn't seem like it.
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